I'm about to lose my Five Guys virginity

"If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent" (essextee) 04/23/2016 at 15:09 • Filed to: None

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AMA. (UPDATE: I am satisfied. The burger was great and the fries were even better)

deekster_caddy > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:11

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Did you get fries with that?

Also, have a milkshake!

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:13

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I loved 5 Guys, until I tried Whataburger.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > deekster_caddy 04/23/2016 at 15:14

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1) Yes, they’re really good.

2) It’s already unhealthy enough as it is, I don’t need a milkshake.

OPPOsaurus WRX > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:14

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How long until the porcelains nuke? I’m also not really a fan of that place. Did you like?

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > OPPOsaurus WRX 04/23/2016 at 15:15

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Pretty damn good, too bad there’s none in my area. I’m on vacation in Cleveland right now.

TheHondaBro > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:17

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How long did it take for your stale hamburger to turn into a greasy salad?

In-N-Out Master Race.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/23/2016 at 15:17

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I’ve heard good things about Hardees/Carl jr’s, but theres none in my part of the country.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:20

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Whataburger is miles better than Hardee’s.

G_Body_Man: Sponsored by the number 3 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:21

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When losing your Five Guys virginity, it’s important to take it slowly and use plenty of lube.

#phrasing

Daily Drives a Dragon - One Last Lap > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:21

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Why did you want to go to 5 guys?

Phyrxes once again has a wagon! > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:21

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Regular or cajun fries? Smashburger is worth a try if you have one near you, I prefer them to five guys.

JeepJeremy > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:22

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Did you enjoy it? Were you dumbfounded over the insane amount of French fries you get?

Svend > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:22

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As a person not from the U.S. And not knowing of a chain called ‘5 Guys’, that title sounds like a five on one sex evening/party/session/(not sure what to call it).

boredalways > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:23

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It’s ok to say that you are visting friends and family in Cleveland, instead of saying you’re vacationing there.

also, wtf took you so long to get to a Five Guys?

deekster_caddy > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:23

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Might as well enjoy the whole experience, have a milkshake! They are almost as good as the fries...

FromCanadaWithLove > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:23

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What did you think of the prices? I went to one in Ottawa and found it a bit expensive. Something like $35 for two.

jkm7680 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:23

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How did it take you this long?

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > boredalways 04/23/2016 at 15:24

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I live on an island with no fast food chains.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > FromCanadaWithLove 04/23/2016 at 15:26

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I come from a place where a burger and small fries (no drink!) can run you $18 so it was wonderful to only pay $13 for a whole meal.

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > jkm7680 04/23/2016 at 15:26

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I live on an island that has no fast food restaurants.

GhostZ > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:28

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How do you like knowing you’ll consume enough calories for an entire day within 10 minutes?

FromCanadaWithLove > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:29

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That’s terrifying. I’m so sorry. ;(

boredalways > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:37

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very nice

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > FromCanadaWithLove 04/23/2016 at 15:42

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It’s an island with no chain restaurants. The only places to eat are local joints, and they just charge what they want because they have no competition.

jkm7680 > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:48

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Hardees is the most disgusting shit I’ve ever put into my body.

j250ex > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:56

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Did you eat all the fries. I never can

BunkyTheMelon > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 15:56

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I just had Five Guys yesterday. Always a treat! I think I'm still full....

MrDakka > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 16:10

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Need deets on the burger composition

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > MrDakka 04/23/2016 at 16:14

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Just a classic cheeseburger- L, T, O, Mayo

jvirgs drives a Subaru > deekster_caddy 04/23/2016 at 16:18

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I’m pretty sure Five Guys doesn’t serve milkshakes.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 16:39

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I’d put them in different categories. Carl’s used to be pretty amazing as chains went, but they’ve gone downhill in some ways. I don’t live near one anymore, but they do make some good stuff.

Five Guys is far more customizable and closer to a fast food backyard burger. I’m okay with them, but not impressed. Coming from SoCal, it’s hard to be impressed by FG when you're surrounded by In-N-Out.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 16:42

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I am not a fan of their fries. So thick, so mushy. A good fry is thin and crispy.

I don't care how many bags of potatoes you use for decor.

Blondude > Svend 04/23/2016 at 17:12

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V12 Jake- Hittin' Switches > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 17:36

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Nooooooope. Hardee's/Carl's junior is literal cancer. Just no. Eating your money would taste better

Svend > Blondude 04/23/2016 at 17:37

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Ye’, I learnt my lesson to question things.

It reminded me of the time I met this really attractive 60. I mean really attractive I wondered how amazing her daughter might look. So I got talking to her. And it was like she read my mind because after a while she just said “have you ever had a mother daughter combo?”. I said no to which she asked if I was up for it. I stuttered for a while and said “Erm, Er, yes, okay”. So we went back to her’ and as she turned on the hallway light she shouted up the stairs “mum, are you up?”.

Lol.

Ike > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/23/2016 at 18:20

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Better burgers then five guys.

Meatheads, in & out, portillos,

Five guys is not really all that great IMHO anyway. My uncle is a former cook current high end car sales man, he said to truly judge a burger get just the patty and bun, based on this five guys

deekster_caddy > jvirgs drives a Subaru 04/24/2016 at 09:43

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Ours does, and they are good! Maybe it’s called a frappe.

Frank Grimes > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/24/2016 at 20:29

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I think its wise to not get in depth with the toppings on the first go around.